Subjective Character Analysis: Gay for Pay Christmas Baby is a Dull Lay

Subjective Character Analysis: Gay for Pay Christmas Baby is a Dull Lay

Bob Mizer’s description of Dennis Lavia is a short one.

“Dennis Lavia at age 19 born on Christmas Day 1943 in Des Moines, Iowa 5′10″ 150. Did weight training since age of 13. Construction work. Lt. brown hair, blue eyes, 11 1/2 D shoes.”

That’s it. That’s all he had to say. Perhaps because, as his decoded character analysis will show, Dennis was a total snore. It’s the sad truth, but a pert ass and a pair of bedroom eyes might get you through the door, but they won’t guarantee you a return visit. Let’s hope for Dennis’ sake that the same can be said of dull guys that is said of dumb guys - you know, that they do it good.

The boring baby-bodybuilder's complete character analysis follows.

A. Orally Inclined 
B. Masculine Stud
C. Hustler
D. Dull
E. Will Bottom